The first day of the rest of my life, tomorrow.

  So today I realised I had a bit of a dilemma.

  To cut a long story short, I've been in love with the same guy for over a year and by now, I've resigned myelf to the fact that nothing is ever going to happen there. Even though I know that nothing is ever going to happen, I still have a bit of an emotional side related to him. So when last week my best friend of two years decided to get off with him right infront of me, needless to say, I was not impressed. Granted, I don't own him, and he doesn't owe me anything, afterall I'm not his girlfriend. She on the other hand was my best friend and knew exactly how I felt, especially since we had been talking about it only moments before.

  In all honesty, I was only a little mad, and rather upset and probably would have moved on from the whole thing in a matter of days if the following events had not taken place. When I told my best friend I didn't hate her, I just didn't want to talk about what had happened, she went behind my back and told Mike that I was obsessed with him, that I was mentally unstable and had turned everyone I knew against her.

  Regardless of the fact he'd only met her twice, and has known me so much longer, he still took her word without question. He didn't even bother to check with me or anyone else what had actually happened. Instead I was subjected to texts full of abuse which sent me hysterical from the shock of the situation. I haven't spoke to him since and I'm already starting to miss him because we've never fallen out for this long before. I made up with my friend before I knew that she'd been talking about me behind my back to nearly everyone we know.

  It's really frustrating me how two-faced she's been about the whole thing. And that Mike doesn't even know the truth and is hating me for something I haven't even done. Only now it turns out this isn't all she's been lying about, she's been doing it constantly for years, making up rumours and stories for the attention and sympathy and I can't believe what it's taken for me to see it. The stress and worry of the whole thing is starting to make me ill. I want to move colleges and right now, I'm struggling just being in the same room as her.

I'm just so confused.

My real friends have really come out in full force in this, and chii said I should vent on here. So that's why you're being subjected to my confused ramblings. (:

On a positive note, I don't have to go into college tomorrow because I'm doing work experience with children. They are so much easier to understand.